The entire motivation for my desire to get a nice camera and learn how to use it is was to be able to take wonderful photographs of our children. October 19th I peed on a stick and it told me this...
We went to my first appointment November 2nd and saw a sweet little heart beat and found out that I had a 6 week old miracle inside of me... My calculations told me 8 weeks but due to some silly things about me I'm 2 weeks behind the normal pregnancy world... Anyway....
We went to my second appointment November 30th for the 10 week checkup and found out our little baby was the size of an 8.5 week old baby and had no heart beat.
You know, my life has been pretty trial-less. I've never had any of the typical 'trials' that we all hear about. It's nice to know that I can face a 'trial' and still be a happy, optimistic, full of faith person. Oh there have been some hard moments and a few melt downs, but overall I think I've had the most ideal miscarriage a girl could wish for, except that no girl better ever wish for this...
I have never felt closer to Ryan or to my Heavenly Father. Without support from the two of them, life would seem quite bleak at the moment. Emails and texts from family and friends have also been so comforting! Thank you! We feel so blessed to be surrounded by so many wise people. My Uncle emailed me the following quote from a conference talk by Elder Scott:
“As you walk to the boundary of your understanding into the twilight of uncertainty, exercising faith, you will be led to find solutions you would not obtain otherwise. With even your strongest faith, God will not always reward you immediately according to your desires. Rather, God will respond with what in His eternal plan is best for you, when it will yield the greatest advantage. Be thankful that sometimes God lets you struggle for a long time before that answer comes. That causes your faith to increase and your character to grow.”
I know this is true from EXPERIENCE! God has a plan for us and we know that it involves some little ones (maybe little redheads... pleeeaase genes) creating havoc in our home someday. Ryan and I can't even comprehend how much more a healthy little baby will mean to us when we get one!
We started a baby journal for our little one that may come down to us in a different body, or maybe we will get to meet him/her in Heaven. We have three entries, I got all my tears out making this one tonight so I may share the other two later... Or we might make you wait until pregnancy #2 for more little journal entries.
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We are all grown up and shopping at Costco with an executive membership
We have sonicare electric toothbrushes and I can now use mine without my mouth getting numb - go me!
We can't wait for Christmas and to have everyone open their gifts from us - come quicker!!!
I can snowboard with Ryan this year (which I'm not sure if I'm really excited about or not... maybe this will be the year I get really good...)
Today was payday and we made the last transfer into our savings to reach our goal we never thought we would reach this year - WOOHOO!
I had my first ever hospital experience and had surgery on December 6th, I'm a true read head because they had to give me some serious meds to get me to stop bleeding, my shoulder was sore from that for a week. The sore shoulder and the sore throat from the tube were the worst part... At our post-surgery appointment yesterday our OB told us that the Pathologist report did not show anything that indicated a miscarriage would happen again - YAY!
My Daddy is here again to work with Ryan and we watched the BEST movie ever last night - you really need to watch it - it's called "Temple Grandin" - don't let the cover that makes it look like not awesome movie deceive you. I think I'm going to watch it again tonight while I edit some pictures. The movie is in redbox - go get it!
We are super excited for the next time we get to make a pregnancy announcement to the blogging world - and I have thought of some WAY good ways to tell ya'll. I wish we didn't have to wait...
8 comments:
It is so hard to know where to begin with something like this. My best friend just had this almost exact thing happen and it was devastating for her. All I could do was cry to know how much she wanted it (finally! It took her much longer than I to be ready for kids and I was so excited I was going to have a little "niece" or "nephew"). It happened in October and she's had her good days and her really-not-so-good-days. All of our friends are at the stage of life to be having babies and it's everywhere we look so being unselfishly happy for them has been a struggle for her I think. I pray for you as I prayed for her! You outlook is so optimistic and I agree, it will all happen according to God's plan. I think I'm going to have to share that quote from your uncle with her! Thinking of you!
Ky, I had no idea! You are the best example to me and how you always deal with life with a smile. P.S. If you want to see my blog send me your email for an invite. teriwadman@gmail.com
You are amazing. But, I already knew that. I sure love you! Can't wait to see you this weekend sweet girl!
I love you so much. You two are going to be the best parents in the world.. I know it will happen when Heavenly father knows its the best timing. Please let us know if you need anything. You are so incredible and I look up to you soo much. ALso, temple grandin- I want to see that- she is autistic! Did you see carson singing happy birthday to nick on our blog? Its soo cute. Love you. see you saturday in your best turtleneck, moo moo attire ;) be there or be square.
Oh Kylee, I'm so so sorry this happend :( But I'm so glad you're getting so much out of it.
I'll keep you in my prayers!
Kylee, I read that journal and started tearing up. You are going to have a very lucky and loved baby one day! I am so thankful that you are able to be as optimistic as possible. It is never an easy thing, BUT I am a firm believer in things happening for a reason. Just enjoy your time together for the time being until a little one does join your cute family!
Kylee, I am so sorry for your loss. As I read your little journal entry tears came to my eyes and I felt how much love you had for that little one. I felt the spirit as I read on about your faith and courage as you experience this trial. You truly are such a strong and beautiful daughter of God and you and Ryan are going to make such wonderful parents. The babies that are going to come to you in this life will truly be so blessed to have you as a mother! I love you and will pray for you. And I am so excited for when you do get to make that special announcement again! I hope it is soon :) Love you so much dear! You are a strength to me and so many others. Thank you for sharing, my heart truly was touched and I admire everything about you.
my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
i cannot even imagine what you're going through. All I can say is that Heavenly Father is aware of you and your situation and you'll be blessed for your faith.
my prayers are with you pretty lady! keep being your wonderful self.
love you lots!
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